TurboFool (Neither, really)

So these videos have been flooding the skeptical community lately, but the latest parody from SNL brought it to the forefront for me again and I thought it was time to post these videos for myself. They’re both just too good, in very different ways, not to pass along.

First off, we have this, er, gem from ICP. Comments to immediately follow…

Okay, so let’s get the obvious out of the way first: holy fucking shit are these guys dumb. Listen, I have nothing against ICP. I also have nothing for ICP. I’m not sure I’ve ever heard their music before, but I know they have a huge, fanatical following, and I can only guess this is due to some level of talent. Heck, they seem to be able to put together a mildly catchy beat and rhyme words in this song, so I’ll give them that.

What they’re apparently incapable of is any level of truly intelligent thought. In this case they’ve decided to take all the majesty of the universe (and kudos to them for appreciating it) and boil it all down to magic. They go through a long list of random (and sometimes truly peculiar) elements of our world, and ascribe them to magic and miracles, as opposed to crediting them to everything we know they actually are. They also throw in UFOs, which is even more random, what with the lack of compelling evidence for their existence and all. Then again, they seem to have no interest in or respect for evidence.

See, according to Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope, see they don’t want to talk to a scientist (it’s unclear if this is only on the subject of how magnets work, or on everything), because “y’all motherfuckers be lyin’, and gettin’ [him] pissed.” Apparently their definition of “lying” includes telling the truth based on cold, hard facts and evidence. Magic and miracles to them are the only truth, and anyone who bothers to explain it is clearly a “motherfucker” and is just trying to confuse their feeble minds. How deeply, deeply sad.

I strongly suggest you check out Rebecca Watson’s beautiful shredding of this video by theorizing a world in which one of these two Clowns isn’t a clueless dipshit and actually answers the other one’s questions intelligently. It’s hilarious and easy to understand, and manages to prove how badly people like these two “musicians” have been screwed by education in this country.

Now the new video that touched off my desire to blog about this one is SNL’s completely brilliant parody. Yes, yes, SNL’s been hit-or-miss over recent years, and I won’t argue that. But occasionally they hit the nail right on the head, as they did here:

The sad part is, the parody is not THAT much stupider than the actual video. Almost any of what went into SNL’s version could have been slipped into the original unnoticed. Their definitions of magic and miracles had THAT low of a threshold, that I wouldn’t have been surprised if clocks landed on their list.

Anyway, as funny as this all is, and damn is it funny, it’s just another wake-up call that if two people like this can manage to escape education on the simplest levels of science, our country needs a lot of help. Schools need to promote science at a much higher level than they are now, and the scientific METHOD most of all, so our future voters and leaders understand that science isn’t just a collection of opinions, but a technique for finding truth. As long as it’s believed to be an ideology, which it most certainly is NOT, it’s too easy for fools like this to consider it an optional opinion and dismiss it. And when they’ve got as many followers as they do, they influence a lot of minds to believe the same clueless garbage. Looks like it’s time to get to work, folks.

Oh, and for those viewing the auto-repost of this on Facebook, click the View Original Post link at the bottom of the Note to see this on my actual blog, with the embedded videos intact. Facebook doesn’t display them.

EDIT: Further courtesy of Skepchick, and specifically the comments, we have these gems:

• Apparently even MTV knows more about science than ICP.
• Cracked proves once again to be an invaluable source of humorous skeptical content
• And lastly, FuckingMagnets.com

All right, so I’m a geek. This is well known, and nothing I hide. Still, there are moments my geekdom sinks (or soars?) to new levels. This is one of them. Below you’ll find a video I literally teared up over, and no it’s nothing remotely sad. I’m just a big frakkin’ geek, and hearing a kids’ chorus beautifully cover the incredible Jonathan Coulton end-credit song to Portal (one of the few games I not only beat, but have replayed after doing so) was a bit too much for me.

So sit back and enjoy. If you’re not a geek or haven’t played the game, you may not get this, but it’s still funny listening to these kids performing the lyrics, and much funnier if you understand them. It’s one of the most wittily-written games ever, and the song plays so well into it.

There’s really not much I can say to do this video justice that isn’t done by the video itself. Well-produced, fantastic animation, and good, clear messages. Glad to see the skeptical community is growing to encompass ALL forms, including people who can produce music like this:

The skeptical, rational, freethinking movement is growing at a ridiculous pace, and is unstoppable. The differences being made every day are more and more powerful and real, and the frauds out to make a dime on the unwitting public’s lack of knowledge are having to work harder than ever to skate past us. We’re on the case, and we’re not resting anymore. If you make your living off of lies and deception, you’d better start watching your back, because I can assure you, we’ve got you in our sights.

I have no idea if this is old, but a friend just sent it to me and I had to post it:

I did some pretty cool things during my time as an actor, and it’s hard not to reminisce. Life has forced me to shift directions in recent years, but that doesn’t stop me from looking back at what I did and using a combination of nostalgia and confirmation bias to exclusively remember how awesome it was. The extremely long hours, the stressful interviews, the egotistical celebrities, the asshole directors (speaking ONLY of the assholes and not the truly awesome ones), the honeywagons, the unpleasant and sometimes dangerous locations, the best parts of the scenes being edited out, the bad craft service (again, not speaking of the times it kicked ass [Orion, your sandwiches were legendary]), Southwest airlines, being sick on location, roller skating while strapped to your “conjoined twin,” and all the other awful and unpleasant memories have been completely driven from my mind in favor of the good times.

So it was this extremely jaded trip down memory lane that got me searching for some of the more unique side-steps during my career: My roles in music videos.

As you’re all surely aware, I’m highly-regarded for my musical and dancing skills, having enjoyed brief superstardom in Kyrgyzstan in the early ‘90s until… well, I’m sure you all remember the dreadful events of April, 1994 enough to guess what happened next. However, as my musical talents were never as appreciated in the states, or Europe, Australia, the rest of Asia, or, well, anywhere else outside my own head, I had to settle for appearing in several music videos for lesser-known groups such as The Devlins, Live, and The Rolling Stones (I know, I was scratching my head when they told me the names of the bands, too). So, in the spirit of sharing and shameless self-promotion, I now present you my music video collection:

This one was pretty fun to film. It was done in an incredibly old house that was in such bad shape you could see through the gaps in the boards that made up the floors and walls. The filming style and characters were extremely creative, and the experience was great. It was a very long day, and at one point it became clear to the production that they weren’t going to get to me any time soon. Budgets on music videos are relatively tight, and overtime for kids is illegal, so they picked another option that also wasn’t technically kosher and offered to let me work a split day. They sent me home for half the day, paying for whatever I wanted to do in that time period (I rented Donkey Kong Country for the SNES on their expense), and then I came back much later only to sit in a very cold trailer until they finally got around to working with me.

In case you’re unclear, I’m the little boy standing at the head of his dying mother (first appearing at 1:14). One interesting note was that I swear to this day they never filmed me removing the coins from her eyes. I remember placing them ON her eyes, but I don’t remember ever being directed to remove them. My motions look natural enough that I’m unconvinced they reversed the footage, but I’m just not sure. I suppose it’s possible they were still rolling when I removed the coins to do a retake, but I don’t think I would have stayed in-character in doing so. A personal mystery.

I did get to meet the band over lunch, although I wasn’t specifically a fan at the time, so it wasn’t THAT big a deal. I did receive, over time, three separate copies of the album (two of which had the red jewel-case side), and at least one of them was signed by the band. I listened to the album like crazy after that and it quickly became a favorite. It’s only in recent years that I’ve learned they’re considered Christian Rock, at least in some circles, and their lyrics began to fall into place for me with that in mind. Regardless, I still recognize that they write some damn good music, and our clashing beliefs don’t prevent me from enjoying it. Two more videos after the break…

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Talk about a rap for the rest of us. I could get behind rap if more rappers told it like this…

I’ve checked out some of this guy’s (Jon Lajoie) other music videos and they’re just as clever. If you’re familiar with the now-infamous 2 Girls 1 Cup video (thankfully my familiarity is only by description), you’ll especially enjoy his musical tribute. Check out his Funny or Die page for more videos.

I can’t say I’m exactly a huge fan of hip-hop or turntables, but they have their moments. Good turntable work combined with a great violinist, though, makes for something truly impressive…

Courtesy of Esplanade

This guy is ridiculously white, dorky, and awkward, and that’s what makes him all the more brilliant. His raps are extremely clever, and you’d be best off listening to this one two to three times to truly understand most of what he says. I was blown away by his entire performance.

Check out a few more of his amazing videos after the break…

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