TurboFool (Neither, really)

I haven’t posted anything for a while. This was, ironically, worth breaking my silence for:

I just watched a great video by potholer54 on the “controversial” (among people who don’t know wtf they’re talking about) subject of carbon dating and just had to post it here:

It leads me to question these unfortunately common tactics of creationists to explain their ideological viewpoints. In this case the never-failing-to-amuse Kent Hovind manages to quote-mine papers, skew findings to achieve his desired explanation, ignore already well-known limitations of the technology within the scientific community to show what’s already been found and worked around, and ignore direct warnings from scientists over the fact that the results he’d get were KNOWN to not be of what he was trying to find. And yet he goes right ahead anyway and does all of this to “prove” that carbon dating doesn’t work when it’s clearly only HE that isn’t working properly.

Now most assume this guy is just plain dishonest. And given his history of and imprisonment over tax evasion, it’s a fair assumption. But it’s not definitely the case. It’s also entirely possible that this guy is a complete idiot. Yes, yes, he’s a “doctor,” and he speaks in a way that suggests some level of intelligence, but those aren’t proof either. And then there’s the old cognitive dissonance issue where he believes his viewpoint so strongly that he’ll do anything to back it up, justifying the dishonesty to the point where he doesn’t even realize he’s being dishonest. I think it’s likely the first problem or the last, the first placing the blame entirely on Hovind, the last putting more of the blame on the overall concept that’s poisoned his mind so deeply against reality.

At the end of the day, believe what you will, but don’t fucking lie about it to me or impressionable people. Stick to facts, stick to proof, stick to reliable evidence, stick to reality, or STFU. You’re not helping yourself or anyone else by spreading arguments that are provably wrong, and especially arguments that were already proven wrong to you BEFORE you used them. Adjust, learn, adapt, and evolve your arguments as you learn. I know it runs contradictory to your view that the world is nothing but cold stone facts written in an ancient book, but the truth is our survival depends on adaptation, and you know it. Why else would you have renamed “creation” to “intelligent design?” You know your tactics have to change if they’re going to have any shot at success, and this tactic of continuing to use arguments that were disproven is one of them. Move on. And if you run out of such arguments, maybe it’s time to reconsider your position. You know, the way rational people do.

This song is full of profanity, and it’s likely to piss off a lot of people, potentially including people I know and love dearly. I apologize to them in advance, but I do not, can not, and will not apologize for the content or meaning of the song which I, instead, support with every inch of my being. It’s full of profanity (hence my title), and so is my follow-up. Easily offended? Leave now.

Tim Minchin’s one of my favorite musicians and comedians. He’s funny and honest (which tend to go hand in hand) and has no problem calling an idiot an idiot, and we need more of that. In this case he doesn’t hold back one bit, and I thank him for that.

I don’t respect this authority figure just because a bunch of other supposed authority figures got together and voted that he was the guy who should be the leader of their church. I know as a non-Catholic I can’t possibly understand what it’s like, and how important he is, and how infallible he’s supposed to be. He’s a motherfucker who covered up for and protected child-fuckers. Children were RAPED by men who they and their parents TRUSTED, who they were supposed to trust more than anyone else by the very design of the motherfucking organization, and this trust was violated. And then, when the motherfuckers who violated their trust and bodies were called out on it, even bigger motherfuckers like the current Pope (then a a Cardinal) protected them from prosecution and hid their motherfucking crimes.

So no, I don’t understand your church, and I don’t understand why you feel the need to protect this man when you’d be crying for blood if a cop or a judge or the mayor either fucked your kid or covered up for someone who did. I’m sorry I don’t understand it and I’m sorry I never, ever fucking will. There is no damn bloody excuse for this no matter who this man thinks he is, has been told he is, or has been divinely inspired to be that allows for this.

And in the off chance that I’m fucking wrong, and he is divine, and this is all part of the plan, well you know what? Fuck the motherfucking plan, too. Yes, I’m an atheist, and contrary to what people who can’t comprehend atheism believe, no that doesn’t mean I hate your god, or that I’m angry at him. It means I simply do not believe he exists. None of your evidence has managed to convince me so far. But just for a moment suppose you managed to do the trick. You managed to find the evidence, display the miracles, push the boundaries and prove to me that, holy shit, it’s all true. If the religion you reveal to me to be reality happens to be one in which motherfuckers like this are RIGHT and JUST in their actions, and your god condones this evil prick’s actions, you’ll only have managed to convince me of your first opinion. Because that’s a god I could hate, loathe, revile, detest, and vow my life against. That’s a sick, twisted deity, and one that doesn’t fit your descriptions of a loving, just god. At that point I’d be more interested in taking my chances with the devil.

So these videos have been flooding the skeptical community lately, but the latest parody from SNL brought it to the forefront for me again and I thought it was time to post these videos for myself. They’re both just too good, in very different ways, not to pass along.

First off, we have this, er, gem from ICP. Comments to immediately follow…

Okay, so let’s get the obvious out of the way first: holy fucking shit are these guys dumb. Listen, I have nothing against ICP. I also have nothing for ICP. I’m not sure I’ve ever heard their music before, but I know they have a huge, fanatical following, and I can only guess this is due to some level of talent. Heck, they seem to be able to put together a mildly catchy beat and rhyme words in this song, so I’ll give them that.

What they’re apparently incapable of is any level of truly intelligent thought. In this case they’ve decided to take all the majesty of the universe (and kudos to them for appreciating it) and boil it all down to magic. They go through a long list of random (and sometimes truly peculiar) elements of our world, and ascribe them to magic and miracles, as opposed to crediting them to everything we know they actually are. They also throw in UFOs, which is even more random, what with the lack of compelling evidence for their existence and all. Then again, they seem to have no interest in or respect for evidence.

See, according to Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope, see they don’t want to talk to a scientist (it’s unclear if this is only on the subject of how magnets work, or on everything), because “y’all motherfuckers be lyin’, and gettin’ [him] pissed.” Apparently their definition of “lying” includes telling the truth based on cold, hard facts and evidence. Magic and miracles to them are the only truth, and anyone who bothers to explain it is clearly a “motherfucker” and is just trying to confuse their feeble minds. How deeply, deeply sad.

I strongly suggest you check out Rebecca Watson’s beautiful shredding of this video by theorizing a world in which one of these two Clowns isn’t a clueless dipshit and actually answers the other one’s questions intelligently. It’s hilarious and easy to understand, and manages to prove how badly people like these two “musicians” have been screwed by education in this country.

Now the new video that touched off my desire to blog about this one is SNL’s completely brilliant parody. Yes, yes, SNL’s been hit-or-miss over recent years, and I won’t argue that. But occasionally they hit the nail right on the head, as they did here:

The sad part is, the parody is not THAT much stupider than the actual video. Almost any of what went into SNL’s version could have been slipped into the original unnoticed. Their definitions of magic and miracles had THAT low of a threshold, that I wouldn’t have been surprised if clocks landed on their list.

Anyway, as funny as this all is, and damn is it funny, it’s just another wake-up call that if two people like this can manage to escape education on the simplest levels of science, our country needs a lot of help. Schools need to promote science at a much higher level than they are now, and the scientific METHOD most of all, so our future voters and leaders understand that science isn’t just a collection of opinions, but a technique for finding truth. As long as it’s believed to be an ideology, which it most certainly is NOT, it’s too easy for fools like this to consider it an optional opinion and dismiss it. And when they’ve got as many followers as they do, they influence a lot of minds to believe the same clueless garbage. Looks like it’s time to get to work, folks.

Oh, and for those viewing the auto-repost of this on Facebook, click the View Original Post link at the bottom of the Note to see this on my actual blog, with the embedded videos intact. Facebook doesn’t display them.

EDIT: Further courtesy of Skepchick, and specifically the comments, we have these gems:

• Apparently even MTV knows more about science than ICP.
• Cracked proves once again to be an invaluable source of humorous skeptical content
• And lastly, FuckingMagnets.com

All right, so I’m a geek. This is well known, and nothing I hide. Still, there are moments my geekdom sinks (or soars?) to new levels. This is one of them. Below you’ll find a video I literally teared up over, and no it’s nothing remotely sad. I’m just a big frakkin’ geek, and hearing a kids’ chorus beautifully cover the incredible Jonathan Coulton end-credit song to Portal (one of the few games I not only beat, but have replayed after doing so) was a bit too much for me.

So sit back and enjoy. If you’re not a geek or haven’t played the game, you may not get this, but it’s still funny listening to these kids performing the lyrics, and much funnier if you understand them. It’s one of the most wittily-written games ever, and the song plays so well into it.

There’s really not much I can say to do this video justice that isn’t done by the video itself. Well-produced, fantastic animation, and good, clear messages. Glad to see the skeptical community is growing to encompass ALL forms, including people who can produce music like this:

The skeptical, rational, freethinking movement is growing at a ridiculous pace, and is unstoppable. The differences being made every day are more and more powerful and real, and the frauds out to make a dime on the unwitting public’s lack of knowledge are having to work harder than ever to skate past us. We’re on the case, and we’re not resting anymore. If you make your living off of lies and deception, you’d better start watching your back, because I can assure you, we’ve got you in our sights.

All right, new episode of Mr. Deity is up, and I’m in it again! Woohoo, go me, living the dream, etc. Check it out (and stick around for the begging segment at the end):

Another good episode, and I loved the PZ references. Definitely some good, subtle stuff in there, and as usual plenty of ad-libbing (the Dagon reference was something I was especially proud of).

Anyway, the season’s nearly wrapped up, then there’ll be a small hiatus and for the first time ever, a Mr. Deity DVD release of the entire third season! Hopefully there’ll be a bunch of bonus content like outtakes (we have, on some very, very rare occasions, botched a line, or done something else mildly unplanned) and extended scenes to make it extra worth it, but just having it without the GoDaddy ads is enough for me. That and maybe no begging, although I find the begging bits nearly as funny (and, admittedly, occasionally funnier) than the episodes themselves, so hopefully they’ll be on the DVDs in one form or another.

Btw, if you were at all confused by the beginning, you may want to check out this Super Bowl commercial after the break to clear things up a bit:

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That’s right, folks, Timmy’s back! And check out what a headache he’s got on his hands…

This one was a doozy to film, because the dialog was so tight and the timing had to be so perfect that we had a lot to focus on. Plus I had worked late the night before, and Jimbo and Brian had spent the day filming another episode first, so none of us was as well-prepared as we would have liked. But that never stops a Mr. Deity, and better yet, some of the funniest things that come out of our mouths are born from sheer delirium.

As well, I was deeply honored to learn (and confirm upon reflection) that I am officially the first recurring character in Mr. Deity history (obviously not counting the four principle players). It means so very much to me to have been so openly and warmly accepted into this group and brought on-board such an amazing project. To go from a rabid fan (thankfully the doctors got that taken care of) to a recurring role as the head of R&D for the entire universe is a literal dream come true. I couldn’t be happier to be involved in something so clever, witty, original, and meaningful.

Well, enough blubbering. The next episode is one I managed to operate cameras and sound for, and it’s damn funny, despite me not appearing in it. Look forward to it in a couple of weeks. And word is I may appear in at least one more episode this season. Stay Tubed…