TurboFool (Neither, really)

I did some pretty cool things during my time as an actor, and it’s hard not to reminisce. Life has forced me to shift directions in recent years, but that doesn’t stop me from looking back at what I did and using a combination of nostalgia and confirmation bias to exclusively remember how awesome it was. The extremely long hours, the stressful interviews, the egotistical celebrities, the asshole directors (speaking ONLY of the assholes and not the truly awesome ones), the honeywagons, the unpleasant and sometimes dangerous locations, the best parts of the scenes being edited out, the bad craft service (again, not speaking of the times it kicked ass [Orion, your sandwiches were legendary]), Southwest airlines, being sick on location, roller skating while strapped to your “conjoined twin,” and all the other awful and unpleasant memories have been completely driven from my mind in favor of the good times.

So it was this extremely jaded trip down memory lane that got me searching for some of the more unique side-steps during my career: My roles in music videos.

As you’re all surely aware, I’m highly-regarded for my musical and dancing skills, having enjoyed brief superstardom in Kyrgyzstan in the early ‘90s until… well, I’m sure you all remember the dreadful events of April, 1994 enough to guess what happened next. However, as my musical talents were never as appreciated in the states, or Europe, Australia, the rest of Asia, or, well, anywhere else outside my own head, I had to settle for appearing in several music videos for lesser-known groups such as The Devlins, Live, and The Rolling Stones (I know, I was scratching my head when they told me the names of the bands, too). So, in the spirit of sharing and shameless self-promotion, I now present you my music video collection:

This one was pretty fun to film. It was done in an incredibly old house that was in such bad shape you could see through the gaps in the boards that made up the floors and walls. The filming style and characters were extremely creative, and the experience was great. It was a very long day, and at one point it became clear to the production that they weren’t going to get to me any time soon. Budgets on music videos are relatively tight, and overtime for kids is illegal, so they picked another option that also wasn’t technically kosher and offered to let me work a split day. They sent me home for half the day, paying for whatever I wanted to do in that time period (I rented Donkey Kong Country for the SNES on their expense), and then I came back much later only to sit in a very cold trailer until they finally got around to working with me.

In case you’re unclear, I’m the little boy standing at the head of his dying mother (first appearing at 1:14). One interesting note was that I swear to this day they never filmed me removing the coins from her eyes. I remember placing them ON her eyes, but I don’t remember ever being directed to remove them. My motions look natural enough that I’m unconvinced they reversed the footage, but I’m just not sure. I suppose it’s possible they were still rolling when I removed the coins to do a retake, but I don’t think I would have stayed in-character in doing so. A personal mystery.

I did get to meet the band over lunch, although I wasn’t specifically a fan at the time, so it wasn’t THAT big a deal. I did receive, over time, three separate copies of the album (two of which had the red jewel-case side), and at least one of them was signed by the band. I listened to the album like crazy after that and it quickly became a favorite. It’s only in recent years that I’ve learned they’re considered Christian Rock, at least in some circles, and their lyrics began to fall into place for me with that in mind. Regardless, I still recognize that they write some damn good music, and our clashing beliefs don’t prevent me from enjoying it. Two more videos after the break…

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